Archive for the 'Essays' Category

Patriotism Run Amok

Posted by Ty Davison on April 27, 2003 under Essays

A critique of Beth Chapman’s Stand Up for America rally speech. If you own Alabama State Treasury bonds, you’ll want to sell.
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You’re Cutting My WHAT?!?

Posted by Ty Davison on April 24, 2003 under Essays

Routine infant circumcision. If baby boys could talk, what do you think they’d say?
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Reflections 9/11

Posted by Ty Davison on September 11, 2002 under Essays

Lessons going unlearned can be funny or sobering. Guess which it is today?
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Winning the American Game

Posted by Ty Davison on October 19, 2001 under Essays

Words, words, and more words on how to get rich (hint: not quickly) and on how to properly understand this screwy board game called Life. I mean capitalism. Either way, time to sell the cattle ranch!
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How Few Thoughts a Brain Holds 5

Posted by Ty Davison on April 16, 2001 under Essays

Chinese airplane bumper cars, Microsoft’s Passport revoked, BC forgets to bring the funny, the NBA tries to get “in the zone,” and the hubris of dot-commers remembered with a sad shake of the head and roll of the eyes.
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How Few Thoughts a Brain Holds 4

Posted by Ty Davison on February 6, 2001 under Essays

Thus spake Zarathustra: Any commentary on 2001 shall include a Green Bay Packer with mouse ears, Dubya’s elevation to the presidency, a rash of dot-com deaths, and the latest in Microsoft idiocy. And so it was written.
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Let’s Be Careful Out There

Posted by Ty Davison on December 9, 2000 under Essays

I live my own episode of COPS. Guns, drugs, busts, sirens, traffic stops. An average night in the life of a Salem Police officer, an adrenaline rush of major proportions for me. Kudos and thanks to the men and women in blue.
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Election 2000: Winners and Losers

Posted by Ty Davison on December 4, 2000 under Essays

It was a time of marvelous political theatre if only for the reason that the suspense was thick and the losers plentiful. We won’t get it this good ever again.
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Election 2000: Brains on Display

Posted by Ty Davison on October 31, 2000 under Essays

I attempt the political punditry equivalent of Evel Knievel’s jump over the Snake River. Will I land safely on the other side by successfully predicting presidential election returns for all 50 states plus the District of Columbia? Or will my guesses turn out to be a crash and burn? Does a Nader victory equal an early parachute deployment? Will I ever stop with this lame stuntman metaphor and just get on with it? Sure thing.
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Ty’s Oregon Voters’ Guide 2000

Posted by Ty Davison on October 21, 2000 under Essays

Want somebody to tell you how to vote? Of course you do! You probably just don’t want it to be me. Oh well, one out of two ain’t bad.
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