I think we can all agree that those buzzing instruments in the stands (vulvas? Something like that, though I’m pretty sure that’s not it. You can’t tell me that’s not a pretty funny thought, though) aren’t the least bit annoying. My God, I could just listen to them for days on end, which it looks like I’m gonna. Honestly, it’s like a swarm of bees decided to live in my stereo speakers and I get an angry buzz in Dolby.

Anyway, Denmark plays a wonderful first half. They’re packing it in, denying space to the Netherland’s attack unlike Australia did with Germany—pay attention SoccerRoos—and with a decent countering opportunity or two they’ve given themselves a chance in this game. Impressive.

Less impressive, however, is the opening minute of the 2nd half as Denmark heads one in for an own goal. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: If you play defense long enough, you’re going to score on yourself. Still, what a terrible, terrible goal to concede. There was very little pressure and the guy just headed off his buddy’s back and in. The rule on goalbox clearances is high, far, and wide—pick any two. If you get three so much the better, but you have to get at least two of those elements. Let’s see: this was not high, not far, and not wide. That’s also known as complete and abject failure. 1-0 Netherlands.

Denmark is well and truly hosed now. They’ve got to push men forward to equalize, and sure enough that gap in the middle gets exploited to make it 2-0. Total props to Denmark’s keeper, though. He’s done a great job and if not for some dreadful bad luck, the Danes might have pulled a draw. Clearly, though, they’ve exposed the proper way to play the Netherlands, and that’s worth something even if they weren’t the ones to take advantage of it.