I’ll be frank: If I’m Ivory Coast, I’m putting somebody on Christian Ronaldo and playing with 10 men. He’s the class of the Portuguese side, and if you take him out of the equation, you’ve got a much better chance of pulling a draw or sneaking a win.

Ronaldo flops and gets a yellow card against for an Ivory Coast player. God, I hate floppers. I’m already hoping for a Portuguese loss. Luckily they, like Spain, always disappoint. I don’t mean sometimes disappoint. I mean always disappoint. If only the same were true of Italy, a team with no equal in its floppitude.

Ronaldo puts one off the post in the 18th minute. Why would you even let him touch the ball if you’re Ivory Coast? If he’s not the best player in the world, he’s what? Top five? Top 10? Either way, he’s the best player on the pitch, and I say you mark him out of the game. 0-0 at half in a fairly interesting game. IC doing better than I expected.

Ronaldo gets fouled but doesn’t get the call—floppers’ justice, we’ll call it—but does pick up a yellow along with the defender he was in a yelling match with. Advantage: Ivory Coast. Speaking of whom, the men in orange have mounted a couple of good chances. I still expect Ronaldo to torch them at some point, but I’d love to see IC score first.

0-0 in a good game where both sides had some chances.