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most self-deluded online superstar

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Election 2004: Brains on display

Honestly, I wasn't that far off in 2000. I only missed Bush by 10 and Gore by 13. Not my fault it was the closest election in the history of ever. (Is it?) Commander Botox vs. Idiot-in-Chief. I'm already on record as saying that I believe John Kerry will be the next President of the United States. I'm also on record as saying that he sure wasn't my first choice. But seeing as how George W. Bush isn't even in my top 1000, Kerry will do just fine. The post debate polling is...

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Gay marriage

"The last chance to preserve marriage in Oregon," reads the brochure. What, are they outlawing it or just forcing everybody to get divorced? "Seven facts you must know," or Seven bogus arguments you must read. Here we go.... Oregon ballot measure 36, for those who don't know, would define marriage as between a man and a woman, effectively barring gay marriages from taking place in the state. Specifically, this constitutional amendment reads: It is the policy of Oregon, and...

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Stopping idiocy in its tracks

If not me, then who? If not now, then when? If not here, then where? If not ham, then no cheese. I throw eggs at a UP professor's scrambled take on morality, Christianity, and the military. Humpty Dumpty had a big fall. The following nonsense appeared in the Summer 2003 issue of Portland Magazine, a University of Portland publication: MILITARY MORALS The Spring issue's editorial, about the late Army Sgt. Keith Robbins and his granddaughter, Air Force cadet Tiffany Anderson...

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How Few Thoughts a Brain Holds 6

Breast-feeding? Statistically awesome. Gay sex? Equally protected. Affirmative action? Halle Berry. Opinions R Us reopens for business. Not that it's been missed. Before Jonah was born I had a friend tell me to be careful at the hospital if Erin and I were going to opt for formula-feeding the newborn instead of breast-feeding. "Those nurses are Nazis about it," he said. Erin and I always planned on having her breast-feed Jonah, so it wasn't an issue for us. It turns out,...

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